My identity as a “journalism student” is abruptly gone and I’m on a mission to regain it. I wasn’t always like this. I can still remember those two years of my life where I would spend hours walking with my camera equipment and notebooks enjoying every moment of creating stories, finding new ways to edit videos and interviewing people.
What Happens After Graduation
A typical day for me looked like early mornings at Tim Hortons and late nights in editing labs where I’d often fall asleep. (Shoutout to all the kind people on the bus who didn’t get mad when I had my heavy equipment occupying seats). That was about a year ago and in retrospect I loved every moment of it. However, the frustration of not finding work in my field after graduating in August left me feeling stripped of all I had learned.
My Dream Opportunity
One day The Lord answered my prayers and I finally got the opportunity to intern at a well known television show here in Toronto. My first week there consisted of training and learning how to perform various tasks. I was learning much more than how to conduct mere tasks however. I was learning about what it was like being behind the scenes of a set and how intense things could get when we were about to go on live. I was astonished whenever I passed by the control room, or when a well known celebrity was on set. I was especially star struck when I got the chance to meet a well known intern. I remember telling him how much I respected him and how I had rooted for him amidst all the crazy things he was asked to do. These were some of the most thrilling times of my journey towards journalism.
After spending a little more time in this internship my zeal began to slowly die down.I began to feel like I wasn’t as wanted nor needed there as I once thought I was. I wasn’t able to go into the show rooms, the camera guy wouldn’t make eye contact with me, and no one asked for my input. I was beginning to contemplate whether they felt that I was not qualified enough to take on a role that involved me being more a part of the team. I also wondered whether or not I myself had too high of an expectation of my role as an intern.After careful contemplation I came to the conclusion that this was not the best place for a budding writer like myself to be. I knew that I did not want to gain a career in this broadcast company at all.
Change Of View
During that time I would often shed tears and would at times become angry with the Lord. I would sometimes ask him why he placed me in an environment like this if I would not be able to showcase my talents.
I spent most of my days there questioning. I would wonder what had happened to the zealous girl who wanted to be a writer. The girl who wanted to start her own young adults book series for young Christians who like herself loved to read. What I longed for the most was how I could use my diploma to best serve the Lord.
That’s when it hit me! I realized that I wanted to be apart of something that would make my resume look good. Something that would make me look good. This aspiration in itself is not a bad thing. It is good for us to strive for excellence in all that we do. Colossians 3:23-24 tells us to work wholeheartedly in whatever we do as though we were working for God and not man and that our reward as a result will come from God himself. I realized though that at the time I was idolizing the names and statuses that being a part of these top notch journalism industries would give me.
I was caught up in notions of what a Journalist should have on their resume. As a result I felt like I was settling by accepting internships that would have me sweeping floors and running errands. I felt like I was compromising all of my skills and getting nothing in return. I was wrong.
Now listen, I’m not telling anyone to join an internship that undermines their skills and experiences just to get into their career field. However, I am saying to make sure that they take a humble posture when they find themselves in this position. I am saying that every experience can be made into a good one when we orient our hearts to what the word of God has to say about these things. Ephesians 5:20 tells us to give thanks to God always for all things. We must trust that God has put us in certain positions for His glory and to make the best of these situations. We must also understand that by embracing these positions that may at times seem lowly we can learn to build connections and network with people who can help us grow in our careers.
From my experience it would be a shame if it I didn’t write since various authors and writers have poured their hearts out on topics similar to this and have comforted me so dearly. I want to freely share what had been my experience and the comfort and joy I’ve received for these times. I think I’ll take this leap of faith and finally start writing.